Category: Personal

  • waiting on the next thing smoking

    waiting on the next thing smoking


    “Her legacy will be cherished by her five daughters, two sons, twenty-one grandchildren, twenty-four great-grandchildren, three nieces and a host of great-nieces, nephews, relatives and friends,” was part of the commentary on the life of a Black woman whose celebration of life took place on April 21, 2012 in the city of Simonton, Texas, which is located within the Houston metropolitan area.

    Willie Flora wasn’t a famous public figure like Maya Angelou, not a political icon of the Civil Rights movement like Rosa Parks, not a household name like Shirley Chisholm – and yet her influence has been felt in the lives of ordinary people who were touched by her generosity of spirit, her keen sense of humor, and her loving care for those who needed help in any form. She has earned her place in Black History Month to many. Her niece Verna wrote a moving tribute to her Aunt Ninnie for the Celebration Program in 2012.

    Aunt Ninnie was called many names, Skin, Cat Momma, Girlie, Aunt, Cousin, Sister, Road dog, Mother, but most of all she was called Mom. She was the type of person that, whatever you needed, no matter what it was, you had it. Now I guess you are wondering, “Why Road dog?” You see, my Auntie was my best friend. I remember when I was staying in Houston, I would call my Auntie every day and ask her what she was doing, and she would say,”Sitting on the side of the bed waiting on the next thing smoking.” We didn’t talk very much; we just enjoyed each other’s company. Man! We all loved her cooking! We couldn’t wait til Sunday, because that’s when we all met after church, and what a time we had! Auntie had something that everyone liked, because she wanted to make everyone happy. That’s the kind of person she was. Our loved one was no stranger to anyone. She was always there with a helping hand. I could go on and on about Mrs. Willie Flora. So Auntie, I’m waiting on the next thing smoking. See you on the other side. Rest in Peace, Love, Verna

    Willie was in my life from the summer I graduated from college in 1967 until her passing in 2012. As Verna said in her tribute above, she was always there with a helping hand to everyone including me and my entire family.

    I loved Willie Flora. I miss her to this day and am waiting with her and Verna on the next thing smoking. See you on the other side, Willie. Rest in Peace, Love, Sheila Rae

    ****************

  • cool at the zoo


    Collins is in town and wants to go to the zoo, I texted Pretty yesterday afternoon; they’ve invited us to bring Ella and Molly to go with them. Collins is the five year old granddaughter of our good friends Francie and Nekki – Collins lives in Charleston but she and Ella went to the zoo together in the days before Molly was born so they weren’t strangers.

    Do you think it’s too cold to take the girls to the zoo? Pretty texted back. Of course, we think any temperature below 60 degrees is freezing. I know, I know. Ask the people who live in other parts of the country about cold – they will laugh at us. Ella is our three year old granddaughter, Molly just turned one year old last week, and we’re worried about a sunny mid afternoon with temps in the 50s.

    It’s a sunshiny day, I said, we’ll keep them warm. To the zoo we went.

    Collins (left) and Ella in zoo’s fun photo booth

    Francie and I crashed photo booth party –

    think the little girls had more fun without us

    we did see a tiger in between photo booth, carousel, playground…

    and souvenir shop

    Nana Pretty with grands watching the tiger –

    Molly taken with big striped cat, Ella studying caves

    Molly kept warm in stroller – had big time watching, absorbing new sights and sounds

    put me down, Naynay – I’d rather walk

    (won’t let he who shall remain nameless take my red hat away from me)

    thanks to Nekki for this last screenshot with Pretty, me and the kids

    this is how we roll with them now that Molly is walking, too

    Ella lives in her own world – we are privileged to share it when it suits her.

    Pretty sent this text to Francie and Nekki last night after we dropped Ella and Molly at home with their parents: “We had such a good time this afternoon. So funny to me that we now have our grandchildren playing together…”

    Next week Pretty and I have our 22nd. Anniversary; these two friends have been with us from the beginning. I know for sure I never dreamed of having these awesome little girls in a million years, but I have celebrated family in new ways with Pretty who brings the fun with her sense of humor that still makes me – and now our granddaughters – laugh.

    President John F. Kennedy said children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see. I love that idea and ask for wisdom to do my part in supporting these little girls with the same love, kindness, understanding and patience my grandmothers gave to me in a time long ago and far away but never forgotten.

    ***************

    Slava Ukraini. For the children.

  • Wanda came to a city near us!

    Wanda came to a city near us!


    Wanda Sykes was in Augusta, Georgia Saturday night

    at the Miller Theater

    Pretty surprised me at Christmas with tickets to see my favorite comedian Wanda Sykes who did, indeed, come to a city near us this past weekend. Wanda “live” was a bucket list experience for me, and Pretty found this event on Wanda’s current tour of the United States in Augusta which is only an hour from where we live. Our friends Francie and Nekki were up for the fun and laughs that made my bucket overflow!

    I chose Wanda Sykes as my first Black History Month honoree because she is one of a kind. One of my favorite quotes of hers wasn’t in her performance Saturday night but it’s a classic:

    I’m a black, gay woman. I think the only way to make the GOP hate me more is if I sent them a video of me rolling around on a pile of welfare checks.

    Tell it, Sister. You make me LOL – no, for real. Laugh out loud.

    If Wanda comes to a city near you, treat yourself.

    ***************************

    Thank you, Pretty, for this special treat; Wanda was all I hoped she would be.

  • Molly, Molly, how do I love thee?

    Molly, Molly, how do I love thee?


    Happy Birthday to our granddaughter Molly Iris who is now one year old!

    (maternal grandmother Gigi laughs at Molly’s first cake experience)

    visiting pup Riley happy to make the party – but what’s up with no cake?

    Molly and her Daddy enjoying time outdoors after cake

    meanwhile, 3 year old big sis Ella focuses on the magical mysteries of sticks

    Molly is a second blessing for Pretty and me this past year – we can’t believe how quickly she’s growing – entirely too fast to suit us. But we are grateful for our time with both granddaughters and their parents Number One Son and Pretty Two whose love for their daughters and us gives hope for the future.

    Molly, Molly, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways – too many to count. Priceless.

    ****************************

    Slava Ukraini. For the children.

  • prejudice by any other name is still prejudice

    prejudice by any other name is still prejudice


    Last night I had a conversation with my cousin Gaylen (son of Ray) who lives near the area demolished by a large tornado that swept south of Houston, Texas yesterday. Thankfully Gaylen and his family escaped damage, but I was surprised when he told me in the course of our chat a compelling account of a wedding in his family several years ago where prejudice and hate intruded like a tornado on a celebration of love. It reminded me of a letter our grandmother wrote my Uncle Ray just before WWII when Ray was working and living on his own in Houston. Today is a rainy dreary weather alert day that matches my feelings of  shame and sadness when I remember this exchange between my grandmother and her two sons who would be swept up in WWII in the European theater. 

    While the war took center stage in everyone’s mind in 1942 and my dad noticed that his hunting and fishing buddies in Richards, Texas had a younger sister, apparently hormones were also raging in my dad’s brother Ray who would have been almost twenty years old in April of 1942 when he received an unexpected letter in the mail from his mother. It was dated April 27th.

    “Dear Ray, Your daddy and I were tickled with your surprise visit this past weekend. You always have to work, and it was a treat for us to have you home for a whole weekend. I am pleased to see that your appetite is still good. I’ve never seen anyone love chicken and dumplings the way you do!

    Now, son, I need to have a serious talk with you about Geneva Walkoviak. I know that you had two dates with her while you were home. We can’t have you getting too serious about Geneva. And, I’m sure you know why. Even though she is pretty and seems sweet enough, the facts are that she is Polish and Catholic and those are two things that don’t mix in our family. You may not be able to appreciate the problems with that, but take my word for it. You stay with your own kind. Now, let’s leave it at that. I know you wouldn’t want to let us down.

    Try to make it home for your daddy’s birthday this summer.  All our love, Mama and Daddy”

    Polish. Catholic. Prejudice takes twists and turns through the years, decades, centuries. The names change, but the sentiments do not. Polish people in Richards at that time had a distinct accent – they were often first and second generation immigrants who farmed the contrary Texas land. The children rode a small yellow school bus to the red brick schoolhouse in town carrying the hopes and dreams of their families in tiny brown paper lunch bags. The men and boys got their haircuts at my grandfather’s barbershop. Their money, as is always the case in prejudice, was evidently neither Polish nor Catholic.

    Today bigotry is often based on what language is spoken, skin color, or country of origin. Hispanic refugees and others seeking asylum in this country are subjected to inhumane treatment that is unacceptable to all of us who respect the values our nation was founded on: everyone is entitled to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. We do not separate children from their mothers and then put them in prison camps. We’ve done that before to African-American slaves whose families were ripped apart and scattered to the four winds. That is not who we think we are. That is not who we are, is it?

    Catholics – Jews – Muslims. The religion roller coaster ride continues with death-defying speed and mind-boggling ticket prices.

    What a tangled web we weave in a small rural southeast Texas community consumed by the thought of a war in 1942, and yet my grandmother decided to set aside time to write a letter to my uncle which sadly exhibited the same kinds of prejudice that created anti-Semitism in Germany which was the impetus for the war in the first place, where a name like Walkoviak and a pretty Catholic girl named Geneva could become the target of pointed prejudice.

    I am ashamed and saddened by this letter. I do not find it surprising, however, because I remember my grandmother as a wonderful strong funny woman – but flawed. She would have been 39 years old when she wrote that revealing letter to her son. I’m not sure her positions changed during the next forty-five years of her life. She agonized over voting for the Democratic candidate John Kennedy in 1960 because of his Catholicism, for example; but I do recall she relented in later years when her grandson, one of Ray’s sons, married a Catholic girl.

    My dad, on the other hand, must have been blissfully unaware of the family drama because three months after his mother’s letter to his brother, he wrote to his parents following a visit  for his father’s birthday on July 29th. His father turned 44 on that birthday. This letter is dated August 1, 1942.

    “Dear Mama and Daddy, It was good to be home for Daddy’s birthday this week. I’m back at work today, and the grocery store is still standing. And, I’m still stocking shelves. Talk about boring. At least, it gives me money for school and to help Lucy and Terrell with the bills. It’s hard to believe I’ve been in Beaumont for a whole year. The War is the big topic on campus and off. Doesn’t look like we’re doing very good against the bad guys. Daddy, you better go up to Washington and see Mr. Roosevelt. I think he needs some good advice for a change. You could get things going in the right direction.

    I didn’t see much of Ray while we were home. He spends a lot of time with Geneva Walkoviak. She’s the only one he likes to spend money on. Of course, I guess you didn’t see much of me, either. Selma and I went to see the same movie three times. I’m beginning to like her more than her brothers.

    Probably won’t be home again until Christmas. The classes are a little harder this year. But, you’ll see that my grades are hanging in there really good. I want you to be proud of me. Your son, Glenn Morris”

    Obviously my uncle Ray rejected his mother’s ultimatum and continued to date the pretty Polish girl who happened to be Catholic. That made me smile.

    Throughout 1942 the impact of the war came closer and closer to home as more  young men enlisted – teenage boys were leaving their farms, day jobs, and classrooms to join the armed forces. They would soon cross oceans by sea and air to defend their country from the Axis powers.

    Ray and his mama

    my Uncle Ray 

    my grandfather George, my daddy Glenn and my grandmother Betha

    My Aunt Lucy

    ********************************

    Slava Ukraini. For the children.