I'll Call It Like I See It

by sheila morris

Category: Personal

  • yesterday when I was young – yeah, but now that I’m old, what’s next?

    yesterday when I was young – yeah, but now that I’m old, what’s next?


    Yesterday, when I was young the taste of life was sweet like rain upon my tongue. I teased at life as if it were a foolish game the way an evening breeze would tease a candle flame. The thousand dreams I dreamed, the splendid things I planned, I always built to last on weak and shifting sand. I lived by night and shunned the naked light of day and only now I see how the years have run away. Yesterday, when I was young there were so many songs that waited to be sung. So many wild pleasures that lay in store for me and so much pain my dazzled eyes refused to see. I ran so fast that time and youth at last ran out. I never stopped to think what life was all about and every conversation that I can recall concerns itself with me and nothing else at all. Yesterday the moon was blue, and every crazy day brought something new to do. And I used my magic age as if it were a wand, I never saw the waste and emptiness beyond. The game of love I played with arrogance and pride, and every flame I lit, so quickly, quickly died The friends I made all seemed somehow to drift away, and only I am left on stage to end the play.Yesterday, when I was young there were so many songs that waited to be sung. So many wild pleasures that lay in store for me, and so much pain my dazzled eyes refused to see. There are so many songs in me that won’t be sung ’cause I feel the bitter taste of tears upon my tongue. And the time has come for me to pay for yesterday when I was young

    (Source: Musixmatch Songwriters: Herbert Kretzmer / Charles Aznavour)

    Unlike the lyrics in this song, I do stop to think what life was all about, a personal luxury as the general life expectancy age for women in the United States is 79 years which will be my age in five weeks. I can identify with these reflections, with their universal themes of how the years run away, the wild pleasures mixed in with the dazzling pain, teasing at life, dreams that won’t ever be realized – all compressed into memory makers. Every day I am reminded that my age is a gift, unmerited favor, grace that should be celebrated.

    The closer I get to a birthday, the more I care about life expectancy and the extra rabbit holes I go down with my Googling. There are more rabbit holes in a Google search than there are Jackrabbits in West Texas. The good news is if I can last just five more weeks until my 79th. birthday on April 21st., my average life expectancy is 9.5 years or I will live until I am 88.5 years old. Sigh. Apparently I need to be extra careful, though. Try not to fall, avoid fatty foods, tell Pretty how much I love her every night, and mostly be a kinder person to my family and friends.

    Fun fact in one rabbit hole: short people outlive tall ones. Good grief. Finally, a benefit of my body type.

  • When We’re Gone, Long Gone

    When We’re Gone, Long Gone


    three women of song who will be remembered long after they’re gone

    Trouble, we have known trouble
    In our struggle just to get by
    Many times the burden’s been heavy
    Still we carried on side by side
    And when we’re gone, long gone
    The only thing that will have mattered
    Is the love that we shared
    And the way that we cared
    When we’re gone, long gone
    And when we’re walking together in glory
    Hand in hand through eternity
    It’s the love that will be remembered
    Not wealth, not poverty
    And when we’re gone, long gone
    The only thing that will have mattered
    Is the love that we’ve shared
    And the way that we cared
    When we’re gone, long gone
    When we’re gone, long gone
    The only thing that will have mattered
    Is the love that we shared
    And the way that we cared
    When we’re gone, long gone

    Source: Musixmatch

    Songwriters: Kieran Kane / Jamie O’hara

    ********************

    Slava Ukraini.

  • International Women’s Day March 8th. – Celebrate, Motivate!

    International Women’s Day March 8th. – Celebrate, Motivate!


    — California Teachers Association

    “For ALL Women and Girls: Rights. Equality. Empowerment.”

    This year’s theme calls for action that can unlock equal rights, power and opportunities for all and a feminist future where no one is left behind.

    —United Nations

    ***********************

    Like many twenty-eight-year-olds I wasn’t interested in finding a personal physician because I hadn’t been really sick after surviving the usual childhood illnesses during the 1950s and 60s. Unlike most young adults in the 1970s, I lived in a city that was a thousand miles from my roots and I needed to see a doctor. A friend at my new job recommended Dr. J. Frank Martin, Sr.; I liked him immediately, but I loved his wife who was the center of warmth for their family practice which has been my medical home for fifty years. Dr. J. Frank Martin, Jr. continued the tradition of his parents following his father’s retirement.

    This past week Sarah Kay Cox Martin died in her home in Hopkins, South Carolina, at the age of 93. I will always remember her kindness, her smile, her sensitivity to a young woman from Texas who found a family practice where family was more than a word. So many memories…

    Rest in peace, Mrs. Martin.

  • Nana, did you marry Naynay?

    Nana, did you marry Naynay?


    five-year-old Ella, three-year-old Molly, and Naynay at Krispy Kreme Store

    Nana and Ella love Krispy Kreme donuts

    Molly doesn’t like donuts (according to her)

    Hmm. Maybe Molly needs to reconsider her position on donuts.

    I’m trying to figure out how to eat the icing first

    is there anything more delicious than a donut?

    Yes! It’s a donut with M&M candy in the icing!

    Such an adventure with our two granddaughters who have grown up with Krispy Kreme donuts but always in a drive-thru setting – never actually going inside a store where the donuts are made. Heavenly aromas as we opened the door to the store and feasts for the eyes that opened wide to see the dozens of varieties in spotless display cases as hundreds of donuts moved through an assembly line in full view behind the cases. The girls were mesmerized and a bit overwhelmed by the choices when we limited them to two each but thrilled to sit at a little table with their milk to experiment with unusual tastes and colors. Finally, a race to the restroom to wash hands and faces when we had to take them to their parents.

    As Nana leaned into the middle row of the grannymobile to buckle Ella in her car seat when we were leaving the Krispy Kreme store, Ella asked out of the blue: Nana, did you marry Naynay? Nana said yes, I did. I was sitting next to Ella who then turned to me and asked the question Naynay, did you marry Nana? I answered yes, I married Nana.

    But you’re both girls, Ella continued, and I nodded yes to her. But that’s okay, I said. Without skipping a beat as the wheels turned in her five-year-old brain she said, Owen had two moms. Owen was a little boy in her first daycare for two years. He did, indeed, have two moms we met when we picked Ella up in the afternoons.

    Yes, I said. We are two of your grandmothers like Owen’s two mothers.

    And that was that. No more questions. No long discussions – they would come later, but for now everything was fine in her mind.

    When could we come back to Krispy Kreme??

    **********************

    Slava Ukraini. For the children.

  • three years of the war in Ukraine and our long term memory loss

    three years of the war in Ukraine and our long term memory loss


    Three years ago today, February 24, 2022, Russia without provocation invaded Ukraine. I know it – you know it. On March 16, 2022, Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy addressed a joint session of the United States Congress to ask for America’s help, and I published this piece on that day.

    In listening to an emotional virtual appeal by Ukraine’s President Zelenskyy to the Congress of the United States this morning, I felt the despair of this leader who had watched his beautiful country together with many numbers of its men, women and children obliterated by an evil neighbor for reasons known only to that neighboring country’s president and his supporters.

    If President Zelenskyy could sing, and I don’t know whether he can, he could have closed with some of the words and music of “I Look to You,” singing along with the American gospel group Selah from their album Hope of the Broken World:

    “As I lay me down, heaven hear me now. Winter storms have come and darkened my sun. After all that I’ve been through, who on earth can I turn to? I look to you, I look to you. After all my strength is gone, in you I can be strong. I look to you.
    And when melodies are gone, in you I hear a song. I look to you.

    I don’t know if I’m gonna make it. Nothing to do but lift my head. My levees are broken, my walls have come crumbling down on me. The rain is falling, defeat is calling, I need you to set me free. Take me far away from the battle – I need you to shine on me.”

    The people of Ukraine are looking to us and our Allies around the globe for help to stop not only the physical crumbling walls but also the assault on our vision of freedom and our democratic way of life. Make no mistake, as President Zelenskyy has consistently reminded us, the destruction of Ukraine is but the beginning of a world war against securing the blessings of individual liberty for all people and for their posterity.

    I have a dream, Zelenskyy said to the Congress today, but I also have a need to reclaim the skies over Ukraine, to stop the senseless bombing of my citizens and our homes. The Ukrainian President is looking to us.

    Yes. We see you, we hear you, we feel your pain. We will respond with gratitude for your fight against a common enemy to serve a greater good.

    Photo by Katie Godowski on Pexels.com

    **************************

    We Americans suffer from long term memory loss – the lessons we painfully absorbed about world wars, global conflicts, political corruption, identifying our enemies, supporting our friends – all 20th. century instructional tools we have conveniently forgotten in this 21st. century have now come home to roost in a new administration that seeks to say No to the needs of our Allies and Yes to the demands of our enemies. Shame on our leaders, shame on us for electing them.

    Photo by Eugenia Sol on Pexels.com

    Slava Ukraini. For the children.