storytelling for truth lovers

  • BJU and Me: Queer Voices from the World’s Most Christian University

    BJU and Me: Queer Voices from the World’s Most Christian University


    “Bob Jones University is a Christian, fundamentalist, nondenominational liberal arts school in Greenville, South Carolina. BJU was founded in 1927 by Christian evangelist Bob Jones Sr., who was against the secularization of higher education and the influence of religious liberalism in denominational colleges. For most of the twentieth century, BJU branded itself as the ‘World’s Most Unusual University’ because of its separatist culture. Many BJU students come from fundamentalist communities and are aware of BJU’s strict rules and conservative lifestyle. So why would queer students enroll at BJU?

    A former queer student of BJU himself, Lance Weldy has come to terms with his own involvement with the institution and has reached out to other queer students to help represent the range of queer experience in this restrictive atmosphere. BJU and Me: Queer Voices from the World’s Most Christian University provides behind-the-scenes explanations from nineteen former BJU students from the past few decades who now identify as LGBTQ+. They write about their experiences, reflect on their relationships with a religious institution, and describe their vulnerability under a controlling regime.

    Some students hid their sexuality and graduated under the radar; others transferred to other schools but faced reparative therapy elsewhere; some endured mandatory counseling sessions on campus; while still others faced incredible obstacles after being outed by or to the BJU administration. These students give voices to their queer experiences at BJU and share their unique stories, including encounters with internal and/or external trauma and their paths to self-validation and recovery. Often their journeys led them out of fundamentalism and the BJU network entirely.” (back cover)

    Editor Lance Weldy is professor of English at Francis Marion University in Florence, South Carolina where Pretty and I met him in April, 2018 when he invited us to his campus to participate in Pride Week with a panel discussion of Southern Perspectives on the Queer Movement: Committed to Home, the stories of twenty-one pioneers in the establishment of organizations for the LGBTQ communities in South Carolina.

    l. to r. Michael, Lance, Pretty, me, Pat at the event on April 04, 2018

    When we were there, Lance told me about a writing project he was working on that also involved first person narratives of queer folks who had a Southern connection but his stories would focus more directly on his alma mater Bob Jones University. His project became this important work published by The University of Georgia Press in June, 2022.

    I am thrilled for Lance and for the queer students who are the brave survivors of persecution at BJU (a name with a double entendre not lost on them) for making their voices heard. Their oppression done in the name of religion follows a long history of odious acts performed by those identifying as true believers and the equally long tradition of those who refuse to succumb to that oppression.

    The book is available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and other booksellers. Celebrate these stories – a part of the queer fabric that comprises the original coat of many colors.

    Onward.

  • never play this game after midnight

    never play this game after midnight


    If you only had two words to describe me, what would they be? I asked Pretty night before last when we were in bed and both still awake after midnight.

    The Australian Open began this week – the first Grand Slam tennis tournament of 2023 – my professional tennis addiction would be in full display for the next two weeks. Oh yes, I watch the events “live” on Australia time which means play begins at 7:00 p.m. my time and continues throughout the night until someone (me) is asleep in front of the Telly. Pretty hangs for a while but goes to bed around 10 o’clock. Pretty is a bit of a wuss, Mate.

    But I digress. On this particular night the AO had just started, and I wasn’t quite in match shape yet so I had come to bed a little before midnight only to find Pretty up late finishing a book she loved. I took my bedtime meds which tend to make me a little chatty with Pretty who prefers peace and quiet and no bedtime meds if possible. I climbed into bed, got under the covers and for some reason I can’t remember decided to play a two-word game with Pretty who admittedly tried to ignore me at first.

    Ok, I said, I know what two words I would use to describe you. Funny and smart. Yep, 100% funny and smart are the two words that come to my mind immediately if you asked me to describe you in just two words. Of course, I have lots of other words, too, but those are the first two words.

    Silence.

    Ok, I said, now what are the first two words you would use to describe me?

    Hm, Pretty said. Well, of course I would say Funny right off the bat. For sure Funny, but I’m having a little trouble with the second word. I’m trying to think of a second one, but hm…is dogged a word?

    Dogged? I asked. Didn’t you mean something like determined?

    No, Pretty said. I’d have to say stronger than determined, and she turned a page in the book she was reading.

    How about persistent? I tried.

    No, definitely not persistent, she replied. Much, much more than persistent, she added.

    I continued to run other words past Pretty who never looked up from her book: tenacious? purposeful? focused? resolute? She continued to shake her head with each guess I offered.

    No, she said, I’m staying with my original “dogged.”

    But you weren’t even sure what that word meant, I protested.

    I just remembered, Pretty said. At this point she sighed, closed her book, and reached to turn off her light.

    Not to be outdone I looked up “dogged” in my Webster’s Thesaurus today in the bright light of day – the synonym given was “stubborn.”

    Point taken. I should have been thankful for Funny – and let it go.

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    Slava Ukraini. For the children.

  • it’s a simple matter of justice – remembering Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

    it’s a simple matter of justice – remembering Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.


    1993 March on Washington for LGBTQ Equality

    Thirty years ago this April I marched with the South Carolina delegation in the 1993 March on Washington. It was a life-changing experience not only for me but for hundreds of thousands of LGBTQ folks and their straight allies.

    I loved that the commemorative poster for the event featured a quote from one of the Civil Rights movement leaders I most admired: Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. The framed poster has been hanging in every office of mine since then.

    “Our freedom was not won a century ago, it is not won today,

    but some small part of it is in our hands,

    and we are no longer marching by ones and twos

    but in legions of thousands,

    convinced now it cannot be denied  by human force.”

    On this special holiday dedicated to you I say thank you for your example of nonviolent social justice change, your ultimate commitment to the possibilities of freedom for all, your powerful voice that spoke for those who could not speak for themselves. Rest in peace, Dr. King, but keep the living stirred up for equal justice for all people everywhere for as long we walk the earth.

    **************************

    Slava Ukraini. For the children.

  • the hideout – revisited on Friday the 13th., 2023

    the hideout – revisited on Friday the 13th., 2023


    On Friday the 13th. of July, 2018, I posted this piece. Time passes, moments are fleeting, but these thoughts hang around while the wind blows a winter’s chill that moves the tall naked sticks that once were trees outside my window this afternoon. I needed a bit of fun, a bit of cheer. Maybe you do, too. Return with me now to those thrilling days of yesteryear when Pretty and I were just a couple of cowpokes in the Wyoming summer...

    Alas, Pretty and Number One Son Drew are winging their way toward Las Vegas on this Friday the 13th. and all of us at Casita de Cardinal will be happy to know they have landed safely tonight. Charly, Spike and I were quite the forlorn threesome when Pretty and her suitcase rolled out of the house this morning. Luckily, I have had an epic Wimbledon Gentlemen’s Semifinal match that lasted over 6 hours to keep my mind occupied today, but tennis has not been a source of comfort for Charly and Spike, I’m afraid. Sigh. Oh, well, it is Friday the 13th.

    In times like these, I often resort to pictures of previous places I have been that make me happy to revisit. One such place was on a trip Pretty and I took 9 years ago with two of our favorite friends, Linda and Beth, to a dude ranch called the Hideout in Shell, Wyoming. Yeehaw. We cowboy.

    Beth (l.) gets credit for planning the adventures

    Pretty embraced the concept…

    Linda (l.) and a wannabe cowgirl Kristi the Kid from Scotland

    another wannabe cowgirl (me) on the left with

    real cowgirl Linda and guide Stewart on the trail

    my horse the oversized Wapiti who was wonderful,

    but oh, so very WIDE…ouch, my aching butt

    this cowgirl needed lots of breaks

    this cowgirl didn’t ever need a break

    the views on the trail were almost as gorgeous as the smiles

    BUT as fate would have it, I was happiest when I was playing Scrabble…

    …and Wapiti was in the pasture having fun with the other horses

    I hope all of my friends in cyberspace have a safe Friday the 13th., a great weekend and wonderful memories of your own Hideouts when you need them.

    ********************

    Slava Ukraini. For the children.