but the Mermaid says we can’t stop when we’re having so much fun!
Molly, Molly – come away with me to my Kingdom in the Sea
is she serious?
who knew being a Princess could be so tiring?
honestly, Nana – I think I’d be happier in a swing
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Yesterday afternoon Nana and Naynay had the great pleasure/treasure of watching 21-month-old Little Sis Molly playing with her four year old Big Sis Ella. The imagination of Ella the Mermaid combined with Molly’s adoration of her big sister bring great joy to their Nanas. In these perilous times at home and abroad, I hope they give you a tiny break with a smile on your face.
“While there are no set beliefs in Quakerism, you will often see a common group of goals, called testimonies: simplicity, peace, integrity, community, equality, and stewardship (SPICES).” When I read this on my Google search for information on Quakers, I said to myself Wow, this is what you’ve believed all your life, these are your core values, turns out you’re a Quaker. Oh, gosh. I was a Quaker for almost a hot minute before I looked at the division within the Friends on the issues of homosexuality and abortion. Sigh. Personal deal breakers for me. So much for community and equality, but count me in for simplicity and peace.
And while I’m thinking of peace, I must say I hesitate to write about people, places, or events that have the potential to (1) display my ignorance of the world outside my life with Pretty or (2) unintentionally do more harm than good to the universe or (3) some combination of these. However, the events in Israel over the past two weeks have evoked feelings of outrage eerily similar to the feelings of anger I experience daily with the updates on the continuing suffering of the people of Ukraine for the past twenty months. Whether for two weeks or two years, the clarion call for peace is difficult to ignore.
President Biden addressed the nation this week to reaffirm America’s commitments in Israel and Ukraine, but our assistance is now delayed by our own House divided in the legislative body that is responsible for appropriations – stymied in a quagmire of political posturing for power by people with no moral conscience while a world desperate for responsible leadership waits and hopes.
During the hot minute I thought I was a Quaker I read a famous quote by an even more famous Quaker named William Penn. Last night Pretty reminded me to refrain from my focus on situations beyond my control, and the Penn quote today hammered home Pretty’s philosophy of living in the moment.
“I expect to pass through this world but once. Any good therefore that I can do, or any kindness or abilities that I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now. Let me not defer it or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”
It seems to me the issue is not about labels, but the questions remain timely for the ages. Can we be kind, will we do good to our fellow human beings? If not today, when? If not us, who? Live in the moment for sure, leave the past failures with their guilt behind – focus on the present with its opporunities for outrageous acts of kindness, everyday rebellions for building communities where equality and inclusion are the foundations of peace.
my grandmother Louise (second from top left) with her Schlinke family
outside their Rosenberg home in 1917
matriarch Selma Buls Schlinkeseated, pregnant with last baby Mary Ellen
Louise and Mr. Boring with theirfirst child, JamesMarion Boring, Jr.
Widowed in 1938 at forty years of age with four children to support, debts to pay, the Great Depression in full swing, a third grade education, living in rural Grimes County, Texas where opportunities for employment were limited – my maternal grandmother Louise waged a private war against poverty, loneliness and depression for many of her remaining years. In 1948 my mother, father and I moved in with my grandmother to share expenses and me; we lived with her for eleven years until I was thirteen years old. I believe selfishly those were the happiest years of her life because they were some of the happiest years of mine, and when we moved 125 miles south to Brazoria, the old enemies she had fought for most of her life reappeared to haunt her home. She didn’t have a car and wouldn’t know how to drive one if she did.
my grandmother Louise Schlinke Boring (r) with her immediate family
mother of four, grandmother of six atSchlinke family reunion in Houstoncirca 1962
As Fate would have it, or when the vicissitudes of life played tricks on us according to my daddy, no matter where you ride to, that’s where you are. My mama and daddy moved to Rosenberg, Texas as soon as I started college at the University of Texas in the summer of 1964. My grandmother Louise had been in and out of mental hospitals for years when she moved to Rosenberg to live with my parents in 1971 following my mother’s exasperation with her mother who she felt could be fine if she just had “somthing to do.” My grandmother died in a hospital in Rosenberg in April, 1972 – she had come full circle to the place where she had been born. Since I had used my savings to make the plane trip from Seattle to Houston at Christmas for the holidays the previous December, I didn’t have the money to fly home for her funeral which was on my twenty-sixth birthday. I was heartbroken for the loss and for not being there when she needed me.
Lots of love, Mother
This coming Friday, October 20th. is my grandmother’s birthday, and I remember her for the unconditional love she gave me for as long as she lived. She was kind, compassionate, caring and a strong woman who refused to allow the old devil to defeat her faith. I honor her every time I tell my granddaughters how much I love them.
pitchers of Sangria helped everyone’s memoryon Game Nights
Playing variations of Trivial Pursuit on monthly Game Nights with friends was a favorite activity of Pretty’s and mine in the early years of our relationship at the turn of the 21st. century. Trivial Pursuit aficionados changed over the years we played except for our two friends Dick and Curtis who enjoyed the merriment as much as we did and never missed the opportunity to get together for fun and games. We reminisced about those times last night over dinner at their lovely “country” home off Backswamp Road in Hopkins, South Carolina. Curtis mentioned he and Dick celebrated their 33rd. Anniversary this year, and that sounded like such a long, long time rather than the hot minute it seemed to me.
Dick and Pretty worked together in the residential real estate business for seventeen of those years which added a new dimension to their friendship, but Curtis and Pretty became the real team for Game Nights. When Curtis and Pretty were on the same team, the rest of us were doomed. Dick and I were always left in their dust, usually rolling our eyes at each other when the teams were chosen because he and I were consistently picked last. Our favorite moments on those nights were the delicious dinners served by the hosts.
Last night wasn’t a Game Night, but we still laugh whenever we gather for the delicious dinners served by our hosts who have welcomed us into their home and lives for as long as they have been together; we celebrate them not only for the joy their friendship gives us but also for their contributions to the advancement of the LGBTQ+ community in South Carolina for more than three decades.
The South Carolina State Fair is in town thru October 22nd. and Friday night at the Fair with three granddaughters was a memory maker. Our core group pictured above: four year oldElla, six year old Collins, Kitty before face paint, and Kaka who has a long tradition of State Fair attendance. Ella adores Collins who is the granddaughter of our best friends Kitty and Kaka. Our group also included Nana Pretty, Pretty Too Caroline the mother of Ella and Molly who spent much of the evening being whirled around in a stroller on loan from Grant who works with Kaka. The stroller was a lifesaver!
Molly and me at the Fair
before getting in better moodwith bucket of Fiske Friesand corn dog
yeah, it’s a corn dog on a stick
and this is how it all went wrong
face painting not for the faint of heart – who is this Joker?
Collins wisely wore hoodiewhich came in handy as soft rain drizzled on us –
raspberry/blueberry snow cones notdisturbed by rain
as girls take break from slides, monster rides, bumper cars and Big Ferris Wheel
pony rides always popular during rain
it’s okay for me to pet Lucy
ducks anyone?
Hey, I had a GREAT time, too, once they let me loose
Caroline texted us after getting Ella and Molly to bed much later than usual following our big evening at the Fair: “Ella told me on the way home she wanted the Fair to be her home and wanted Collins to live there, too. She said she’d sleep on the rides, and they’d pee in the grass. Lol. I was like there are bathrooms, Ella, and she said fine we will use the bathrooms.”
When can we go to the Fair again, Nana?
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For all the children everywhere. Please stay tuned.
P.S. Thanks to Caroline who is responsible for most of these photos. Thanks to all our followers in cyberspace for going to the Fair with us!
I'll Call It Like I See It 
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