Category: LGBTQ+

  • around our world in 30 days

    around our world in 30 days


    November was a bit of a blur for me after our election in the USA on the 5th. followed by Pretty’s knee replacement on the 11th. I’ve been struggling to regain my thoughts, much less my words. Luckily, I do have a few pictures to share on a cold morning in early December – the first one is a full page ad in the December, 2024 issue of The Atlantic which I had time to read since I no longer watch TV except for Netflix, sports, and the local weather. Wow. Take a gander at this, will you? Maybe I need to go back to TV.

    strategic dating?? like a CEO?? (surely, you jest)

    colors on a morning walk in November

    five-year-old granddaughter Ella creates another persona with a hat

    Ella as Ella leaving for school in November

    Ella and her younger sister Molly who will be 3 years old next month came to visit Nana who was icing her new bionic knee after her surgery – Molly wasn’t sure about the incision, but she leaned over to kiss it anyway because that’s what you do for boo-boos. Then she ran off with a look of horror on her little face. Maybe she needed to ask Naynay for a cookie.

    Pretty walking with a cane for her two-week follow up appointment

    (following week taking short strolls around the house without cane!)

    sisters relaxing on our screen porch in their “Baby” pack and play

    (our friend Curtis made the blanket as a baby gift for Ella in 2019)

    Molly and Ella with cousin Caleb at Thanksgiving

    (Caleb was two years old in August)

    Ella and Molly decorating beautiful tree at their house

    Thanksgiving and the month of November are now in our rear view mirror – the holiday season has officially begun as we race toward the finish of 2024.

    Regardless, our terrier Carl and I are thankful for the colors that hang over us in our backyard every morning in every season.

    Onward.

    *********************

    Slava Ukraini. For the children.

  • Dining with Dorothy Allison (April 11, 1949 – November 6, 2024)

    Dining with Dorothy Allison (April 11, 1949 – November 6, 2024)


    Pretty who owned Bluestocking Books, a feminist bookstore in Columbia in 1994, not only loved books but also loved movies. She had co-sponsored Dorothy Allison to do a reading with Women’s Studies at the University of South Carolina on the evening of March 21st. which meant she would miss Tom Hanks’s beautiful acceptance speech for Best Actor in Philadelphia. I didn’t realize that night how important the Oscars were to her because I was enamored by Dorothy Allison’s stories from her award winning book Bastard Out of Carolina that had been published two years earlier.

    At the time I was a financial advisor working with numbers with no thought of writing, but I was mesmerized by this woman who was born in Greenville, South Carolina, in 1949 to a fifteen-year-old mother. Lesbian literary journal Sinister Wisdom recalls Allison’s childhood was marked by poverty, sexual, physical and emotional abuse – themes which became cornerstones of her work. Needless to say following Allison’s talk, I bought her book from Pretty who invited me to go to dinner with a few friends along with Allison.

    My memories of the dinner are unremarkable except that Allison was polite, even cordial but, as Pretty remembered, seemed underwhelmed by our table of local lesbians who were thrilled to be in her presence. Our lives would intersect with hers again twenty-three years later, however.

    In 2017 the University of South Carolina published a collection of oral histories I edited: Southern Perspectives on the Queer Movement, Committed to Home. The back cover included a comment from Dorothy Allison whose storytelling has always been an inspiration to me as a lesbian writer.

    “Thirty years of history retold from the inside is in this anthology. The people who stood up and risked their homes, their families, and their very lives to make the world safer and more just for all of us tell us how they did it, day by day, year by year.”

    Through her books Dorothy Allison told us day by day, year by year of her personal struggles to make the world safer and more just for all. During the Thanksgiving season this year I will be especially thankful for this lesbian activist whose life lifted us to higher ground.

    Dorothy Allison died Wednesday, November 6th., at the age of 75 – her words live on.

    Rest in peace, Dorothy.

  • once upon a time…

    once upon a time…


    Once upon a time a kind queen who loved to wear shorts in warm weather took her two little princesses to a special Halloween festival called Trick or Trunk in the magic land of Westover Acres. All the villagers came together to celebrate by decorating their carriages to welcome the many children who lived in the kingdom.

    Princess Ella and her little sister Princess Molly carry their goody gatherers

    Princess Molly clutches her goody gatherer and stays close to Queen Nana

    oh my, what treasures must be hidden behind the colorful carriage streamers!

    Princess Ella flees the scary ghost who offered her a second piece of candy

    to give her younger sister Princess Molly who was afraid of the ghost

    kind Queen Nana holds Princess Molly while Princess Ella waits her turn

    decisions, decisions – so many yummy choices from Bonnie and Clyde

    kind Queen Nana serves joy juices to the two thirsty princesses

    last stop: corn dogs and chips marked the festival exit

    kind Queen Nana and Princess Ella reach their carriage

    while Princess Molly struggles to keep up

    Queen Nana and Princess Ella all smiles as they leave Trick or Trunk festivities

    (Princess Molly wants to make sure the ghost isn’t going home with them)

    The End.

    ********************

    When I think about the futures of Ella and Molly, my wish for them is they will grow up in a country where they are free to make discoveries of who they are and what they believe with kindness toward others, with love in their hearts, with joy in their souls.

  • a belated Happy Pride!

    a belated Happy Pride!


    Last weekend downtown Columbia hosted the 34th. annual South Carolina Pride March and Festival which is now known as the Famously Hot South Carolina Pride! Festival.

    “To celebrate, to experience queer joy. That’s something that we talk about a lot, is queer joy and queer resilience,” said Dylan Gunnels, president of Famously Hot South Carolina Pride. “Oftentimes, when you hear stories, they might be in a negative light, or we might be focusing on negative legislation or negative experiences. This is our night.” (Corey Thompson, News 19, October 18, 2024)

    Nine years ago as I walked away from the 2015 Pride March and Festival I stopped to take this iconic image of lesbians celebrating on Sumter Street. Clearly inspired, obviously empowered. This remains one of my favorite photos to this day.

    Finally, another favorite from the 2014 Pride celebration:

    The girls (and guys!) who march and/or ride for equal rights truly do rock.

    Thanks to all who led and participated in Pride this year – the future is brighter because of you. Celebrate yourselves!

    Happy Pride! Onward.

    *****************

    “Everyone is entitled to his own opinion – but not to his own facts.” – Senator Daniel Patrick Moynihan

  • Hallelujah, Hope is Making a Comeback!

    Hallelujah, Hope is Making a Comeback!


    Thanks to former First Lady Michelle Obama for reminding me at the Democratic National Convention this week of our mutual feelings sixteen years ago when a young Senator from Illinois, her husband Barack Obama, was nominated to become President of the United States. President Obama became the champion of “hope” in my mind forever because he believed in the possibility of positive change in a nation I sensed we both loved. I’ve missed them both.

    We choose hope over fear. We see the future not as something out of our control, but as something we can shape for the better through concerted and collective effort. We reject fatalism or cynicism when it comes to human affairs; we choose to work for the world as it should be, as our children deserve it to be. (President Obama to the United Nations General Assembly, September 24, 2014)

    four-year-old Ella on board the Harris/Walz JOY Campaign Train in playhouse at the zoo yesterday while two-year-old Molly hoped for height

    My hope is we will choose to work together for the world as it should be, as all children deserve it to be.

    Onward.