storytelling for truth lovers

  • the legacy of Carport Kitty

    the legacy of Carport Kitty


    Nine months ago in October, 2022 Pretty and I said our final goodbye to Carport Kitty, a calico cat we shared with our Cardinal Avenue neighbors for two years. We shed many tears that day and in the days since, but her legacy lives on in the carport she called home.

    ****************

    two feral cats flank stray cat in middle

    all welcomed in memory of Carport Kitty

    stray cat wants to come inside – definitely socialized by someone

    can you please give me a home?

  • You Bet Your Life (from Deep in the Heart)

    You Bet Your Life (from Deep in the Heart)


    So that’s the antenna? I asked Daddy as we stared at the man on our roof. That’s it, Sheila Rae. Looks like something from outer space, doesn’t it? Rex, our lemon-spotted pointer puppy, was running circles around the house and barking at the men who were installing the antenna. The fellow on the ground holding the ladder glanced nervously between Rex and the man above.

    Hurry up, Perry. I can’t hold this thing forever, Homer Bookman called to his brother. We’ve got to install another one before dark. And it’s all the way to Shiro. So get a move on.

    Hey, Homer, Daddy said. What are all those wires hanging down from that contraption? Are you sure this thing’s gonna work?

    You bet, Glenn, Homer said as he helped Perry climb down. Can’t say I really know what the wires are for. They somehow grab the pictures and sound out of the air, and then they go to the box with the little screen. Bingo! You’ve got yourself a genuine television set complete with all the bells and whistles. Yes sir, you’ve bought the airwaves of the future. When people gather round to watch a program, they’ll say Glenn Morris is more than a school man. He’s a man who marches to a different drummer and is a forward thinker. He gives his family the very best that money can buy. In this year of our Lord 1953 the Morris family leads the good people of Richards, Texas to experience the unknown. Don’t forget to say you made this important purchase at Bookman’s Appliances, he added.

    Well, let’s give it a try, Perry said.

    You’re certainly a salesman, Homer. No doubt about it, Daddy said, laughing. Daddy led me and Homer and Perry Bookman inside the house to our living room where the new brown box with the tiny screen sat. It was almost as tall as I was and had several knobs. Homer gave Daddy and me a lesson on their uses. We were definitely impressed.

    Go ahead and turn it on, Homer instructed. It won’t bite. Daddy bent down and turned the first knob. We all stared expectantly. Magically, the small screen came to life with an unusual stationary design in the center: a black and white triangle in a circle with some black lines down the side.

    That’s the test pattern, Perry offered. It’s what you see when there’s nothing on a channel. It’s pretty great, isn’t it? We all nodded as we gazed intently at the miracle before us. Television. Like radio with a picture. Like having a movie in your own home. We were surely blessed to have this wonder in our midst. Everyone beamed with happiness.

    Well, Glenn, just sign here and it’s all yours, Homer said. Daddy signed the paper and shook their hands. I had no inkling at the time that my world was about to expand. The box with the screen would entertain, inform and inspire my own imagination. The only child had a new best friend.

    *************

    Dude, you better hurry up. It’s almost time for Groucho Marx, I called to my grandmother from the living room. I was in my favorite spot, sitting on the floor directly in front of the television. It was Thursday night and the quiz show “You Bet Your Life” was about to begin. Dude came in and took her customary place on the sofa in the back of the room. She had her Pond’s cleansing cream that she used every night to remove her makeup while we watched our shows.

    Groucho! Dude and I shouted in unison with the TV audience as George Fenneman, the show’s announcer, began his introduction with “Now, here he is. The one, the only ________!” From our living room, we helped the audience fill in the blank. Groucho himself was nattily attired in a suit with a bow tie and professorial eyeglasses. The smoke from his omnipresent cigar filled the screen as he gave us the rules of the show. Maximum winning potential of $10,000, which was small potatoes for quiz shows even in the 1950s. Say the secret word and get another $100. The papier-mache duck dropped down to reveal tonight’s secret word: Turkey.

    That’s a good one, Dude said. Groucha will have fun with that. She called Groucho “Groucha,” and I tried for a long time to correct her, but finally gave up. We loved the secret word jokes he played on his contestants. Tonight’s contender was going to become one of my favorites. She was a beautiful woman named Sylvia from Los Angeles. Groucho loved the attractive women and spent a longer time getting to know them than he did the men. Tonight’s interview revealed Sylvia had a husband named Jerry who worked nights for the utility company. You’d be amazed what you can do when your husband works nights, Sylvia said. She smiled at Groucho in a suggestive manner. You might be amazed, he quipped, but I wouldn’t. The audience roared with laughter, and so did Dude and me. Sylvia didn’t win or say the secret word, but she did give Groucho her phone number.

    I wanted to be Groucho. Not handsome like George Fenneman, but so funny even the married women flirted shamelessly with him. I saw myself with the cigar and moustache. Not at all a bad look.

    ****************

    Saturday mornings meant westerns for Daddy and me. The Lone Ranger rides again. The Cisco Kid and Pancho, the lovable sidekick, who made Cisco shake with laughter. Cisco seemed to be overly preoccupied with the angle of his sombrero, but he was crazy about Pancho. The Range Rider. The Adventures of Kit Carson. Sky King and his niece, Penny. What was that airplane about anyway? And why did Penny go everywhere with her uncle? Gene Autry the singing cowboy.

    And of course our personal favorite Roy Rogers, King of the Cowboys. We loved Roy and Trigger, his golden palomino steed. We tolerated Dale Evans, Queen of the West, and her main ride Buttermilk because Roy obviously thought so highly of her. We wished for a dog like Bullet, his German Shepherd, who could have been a big help herding cows at our farm. We laughed at the antics of Pat Brady and his jeep Nellybelle, who were always in trouble, and at Gabby Hayes with his original bear look. We knew all the songs of the Sons of the Pioneers and loudly sang along with them in the theater of our own living room. I was Roy Rogers. I rescued damsels in distress. I thwarted cattle rustlers.

    I captured bank robbers. I sang “Don’t Fence Me In” and meant it. I warbled“A Gay Ranchero” before gay was anything other than happy. When Roy and Dale were guest stars at the Houston Fat Stock Show and Rodeo, Daddy took me to see them in person. I wasn’t a fan of rodeos, but I endured the bronco riding, calf roping, barrel racing and unfunny rodeo clowns to see Roy and Dale. Then, in the darkness of the gigantic Houston coliseum, Daddy helped me make my way down the stairs from our seats to climb onto the arena railings as the spotlights searched the blackness for their entrance.

    What a spectacle it was! Roy and Dale rode Trigger and Buttermilk into the center of the ring to the music of “The Yellow Rose of Texas” blaring across the Coliseum. Their outfits were dazzling. Diamond-studded. Large silver belt buckles gleamed as the lights reflected off them. They wore matching cowboy hats with amber beads and white leather fringe against black cotton shirts. Lots of fringe. Leather black-and-white cowboy boots with flowers down the side that glowed in their stirrups as they rode. It was breathtaking pageantry to this eight-year-old Roy Rogers wannabe. They sang and talked and roped and sang some more, and the grand finale was their signature “Happy Trails to You” as they rode around the arena railing, shaking hands with each tiny cowpoke who had made the trek from their seats to hang on through the show and wait for their personal touch. I was mesmerized. I saw myself riding Trigger around the country and wearing that glittering cowboy outfit. I could make the hat and boots work, too. Not at all a bad look. Little cowgirls everywhere would love me.

    ****************

    “Say, kids, what time is it?” It’s Howdy Doody time!

    Television after school evolved from Buffalo Bob and the Howdy Doody gang that admonished us to be good little boys and girls while we drank lots of chocolate Ovaltine, to Dick Clark and “American Bandstand” which encouraged us to “rock around the clock.” Somewhere in between, we became Mouseketeers with our very own roll call and special head gear. The Hardy Boys and Spin and Marty were my teenage heroes, and I fell hopelessly in love with Annette Funicello. I could hardly pronounce her last name, but what did it matter? She was Eye-talian and so exotic. She was perky, too – in all the right places. If I could find out where she lived, I thought, I would fly there in one of those Sky King airplanes. I would take Penny, too. Then if Annette declared her love for Tommy Kirk or Frankie Avalon was undying, I’d still have the effervescent Penny. Delicious. I ordered the Mickey Mouse ears from the Mickey Mouse Club, since that was the look Annette obviously liked. Not at all a bad look. Say goodbye to Tommy and Frankie, Annette.

    Penny of Sky King

    *********************

    Turn off that TV, Daddy finally said one afternoon in early autumn. Let’s go outside to play basketball. I put the goal up for you so we could spend some time working on your game. Guess what? One of the biggest mistakes I ever made was buying that television all those years ago. Things haven’t been the same since. He was right on target. My emotional attachment to television did stand the test of time. The first one I purchased for myself was a small color portable in 1967 when I got my first adult job in Houston after graduating from college. It was one of a very few possessions I took with me the following year when I drove to Seattle, Washington to get as far away from the piney woods of east Texas as I geographically could without crossing a major body of water, like an ocean. I wanted to see if I could live my own life without fear of running into one of my Houston relatives wherever I went. I was twenty-two years old.

    In an unfortunate turn of events, I had to trade my beloved color portable RCA television for a month’s rent while there. I had spent the rent money on a marathon telephone conversation with a girlfriend from college who was in Hawaii training for the Peace Corps. I tried all night long to get her to abandon serving her country and come live with me. She declined. The telephone company contacted me at work the next day, told me I had exceeded my credit with them, and payment was due immediately. My landlady had coveted my color TV, and I learned a great life lesson in economics: the law of supply and demand plus lust equals no TV.

    The loss of the television was as devastating as the loss of the girl.

  • Ella and the Family Reunion

    Ella and the Family Reunion


    Ella and her six-year-old cousin Dansby share picnic at

    Alverson family reunion in upstate South Carolina

    my first family reunion, so many people and everyone’s my cousin

    cheetos and hot dog perfect for picnic

    I feel like dancing

    look at that girl cousin – she’s dancing

    I hope you never lose your sense of wonder,
    You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger,
    May you never take one single breath for granted,

    God forbid love ever leave you empty handed,
    I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,

    Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens,
    Promise me that you’ll give faith a fighting chance,

    And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.

    I hope you dance… I hope you dance…

    and she did

    *********************

    Slava Ukraini. For the children.

  • Skeleton in the Closet (from Deep in the Heart)

    Skeleton in the Closet (from Deep in the Heart)


    “Pass Grandpa Schlinke the fried chicken, Sheila Rae,” my grandmother Dude said as I was about to take a drumstick from the platter in front of me. “You know he always gets the first piece.”

    How could anyone forget, I thought. I picked up the platter and gave it to my great-grandfather, who sat like a king at the head of our dining room table. He looked imperious as he sat there in his starched white shirt and black trousers held up by dark suspenders. His face was inscrutable as he searched the platter for his favorite pieces. He found the two best ones with white meat, the breast and the pulley bone, and picked them up with his fingers.He placed them ceremoniously on his plate. With something of a grunt, he passed the meat to my Grandma Schlinke, who was seated on his right.

    And so, the order was established. Every dish went first to Grandpa Schlinke, and then made its way from him to the rest of us. Uncle Toby, my mother’s brother who lived with us, sat next to Grandma Schlinke. Then came Daddy, who sat at the foot of the table at the opposite end from Grandpa. Mama sat next to him, and I sat in the middle between her and Dude, my mother’s mother. Dude had to be next to Grandpa so she could jump up to get him more sweet tea or homemade rolls. He had a healthy appetite.

    Grandpa and Grandma Schlinke were my grandmother’s parents. They lived in Houston with my Uncle Otto, who was their youngest son. Once each summer they came to Richards which they considered way out in the country to stay with us for a few days. Everything changed when they visited. For one thing, we ate every meal in the dining room, which we rarely used. For another, I slept on a pallet on the floor because we really didn’t have enough beds for everyone. It was okay, but I was usually happy to see them leave.

    They were mysterious to me. I first believed part of the enigma was they didn’t speak English well. They had spoken German until their thirteen children brought English home from the public schools. As I got to know them better, I decided they weren’t big talkers in any language.

    Every morning after breakfast, Grandpa Schlinke would order me to bring him the newspaper, which he would take to a rocking chair on the front porch. There he would sit and read and rock. Always dressed in the same white shirt and black pants with suspenders. And bare feet. One of the few comments he directed toward me was to caution me about shoes. “Shoes are the tools of the devil,” he pronounced.

    I tried very hard to like this crusty old man because he was Dude’s father. I loved her so much I knew I should love him, too. She was always thrilled to have her parents visit and wanted everything to be just right for them. I felt I should try to entertain him, since Daddy and Dude were at work, and Mama was gone to college in Huntsville, where she was working on her degree. Uncle Toby was forever listening to his “Back to the Bible” broadcast on the radio and working crossword puzzles. Grandma Schlinke constantly cleaned or cooked. She would sweep the kitchen several times a day. Who knew why?

    At any rate, that left me to sit with Grandpa Schlinke on the front porch while he rocked. “What are you reading today, Grandpa?” I asked one morning. “The news of the day,” he replied. “Anything in particular?” I persisted. Being eight years old, and trying to play the genial hostess for this gruff ninety-something-year-old man was challenging.

    He paused in his reading and stared into the space in front of him. His eyes were small for his big German face with a nose like Pinocchio. A slight breeze blew the few tufts of his white hair as he rocked. I tried to follow his gaze. The crape myrtles directly in the center of our vision were a brilliant hot pink and in full bloom. The grass was perfectly manicured and emerald, green. Across the dirt road was Anna and Tom Owen Smith’s neat white frame house that looked very much like ours. Nothing stirring there. Beyond their house we had in our sights the roof of the general store where Dude worked. I heard a bee humming in some verbenas near where we sat. There were no other sounds. It was going to be a long day for me with this old man.

    “I was in jail once,” Grandpa Schlinke said from out of the blue. “The sheriff came to my house and arrested me and took me to the county jail.” He stared some more. My mind snapped to attention. This was a news flash. My first thought was, did Mama know? She wouldn’t have liked to think that her grandfather had ever been in jail. I knew that without a doubt. That was the wrong image of our family, for sure. Surely, Dude must have known. Maybe she had even been there when the sheriff came to take away her father. How old had she been? My mind was racing with a million questions. I had to be careful, though. This was a situation requiring great diplomacy to elicit valuable information. I walked on eggshells.

    “What did you do?” I asked. I was trying to keep excitement out of my voice so that Grandpa would continue. He sat and looked upward to the blue sky, apparently for direction. “I had eleven living children of my own, and then my brother died. He left two more, Arnold and Amelia. I promised him I would take care of them for him. So now we had thirteen children on our farm. There was no money and the cotton crop was very poor.”

    He stopped. I waited. No one got arrested for having thirteen children and a bad cotton crop, did they? Surely not. Grandpa turned in the rocker to look squarely at me. He looked right through me with those beady eyes and spoke again. “I had a neighbor named Neville Johnson who told me we could make a lot of money in a new business that wasn’t hard to learn. Neville had capital to get started. So, we made a partnership. Neville and me. Partners. Sealed with a handshake and our word.”

    Grandpa paused, gazing again at the crape myrtles. Finally, he turned and looked down at me. He seemed to have reached a momentous decision. I held my breath. “We built a still and made moonshine whiskey in the back of my farm. We made good money for a few months. I was getting caught up on paying my bills. My children were eating regularly. Life was better.” His eyes grew moist. “One night Neville Johnson didn’t come to the still. Instead, the sheriff came that night and busted up everything we had. He arrested me and took me to jail. The deputies threatened me with guns and called me a kraut-head. The booming business was over.”

    I nodded encouragement and waited expectantly for more of the story. Grandpa calmly picked up his paper and resumed reading. Apparently he was finished. A few questions would be left unanswered.

    I asked Dude about this episode later, and she said she knew. Of course, everyone knew. He had come back from jail after a few months. Her brothers had planted the cotton while he was away. The moonshine money had kept them fed and clothed until the next cotton crop was sold. That was all you could say about it, she implied.

    I never took up the matter again with Grandpa Schlinke, but somehow the story made him seem real to me. Maybe the reason he didn’t talk a lot was he was too busy with his memories of people who were no longer there. Like Neville Johnson.

    *******************

    The blossoms of the crape myrtle tree in our front yard will soon be ablaze with the bright pink signature color I love most – perhaps because pink was the color of the ones in the yard at my grandmother’s house in Richards, Texas. Crape myrtles love the summer heat in South Carolina as they did the brutal Texas heat seven decades ago; today I was reminded of this story my great-grandfather shared with me when I was a child while we sat on a small front porch one summer looking at nothing but pink blossoms and his memories.

  • Outing at Soldier Field – Part 3 (from Not Quite the Same)

    Outing at Soldier Field – Part 3 (from Not Quite the Same)


    Soldier Field was like a religious experience for lifelong football fans. I grew up with Da Bears on television for the past fifty years. Teresa and I both knew most of the names on the murals that chronicled their fabled history. Red Grange. Papa Bear Halas. Dick Butkus. Walter Payton. William “Refrigerator” Perry. Jim McMahon. The wild and crazy players and coaches that were household names in our lives. It was like a trip to Mecca for a Muslim. It was holy ground for both of us.

    Our seats were in an end zone and very good. Hundreds of Bears fans around us with a few scattered Panther blues in the midst. It was a very different culture from our games at home. One of our first impressions was the maleness of the game. There were very few women in the entire stadium. Testosterone was the hormone of the hour, and it raged with a vengeance. The row of men behind us defined Da Bears as I always thought of them. Big blue-collar guys in their mid-thirties who loved their beer and their Bears.

    I learned some things I didn’t know, though. These men loved to sing. There was a fight song created in 1941, and the entire stadium was singing it on cue sixty-five years later. “Bear Down, Chicago Bears,” they sang lustily whenever the Bears made a good play or when the defense was asked to step up to stop us. That was a tall order this day. On the second play from scrimmage our quarterback, Jake Delhomme, hit our pro bowl receiver, Steve Smith, for a long touchdown pass to our end zone, and the tone was set. Teresa and I hugged each other, laughed, and were so excited. We couldn’t believe it, and neither could Da Bears. The rest of the game was close and could have gone either way, but we were never behind from that play in the first minute of the game. Unbelievable. Our relatively young professional football franchise held its own amid the echoes of the legends as the wind swirled around us.

    I begged Teresa for the blanket I hadn’t wanted to bring as soon as we sat down. And, although she tried to get me to wait until I was cold beyond belief, she did relent and put it around us. She also brought out all the scarves and wrapped them around our heads so that we looked like blue blobs sitting on black coats. We spent much of the game jumping up and cheering but then quickly trying to bundle back up when our blanket slid off. We froze.

    The men sitting next to us in our end zone said this was much too warm for football. They had wished for snow and sleet for the game so that our players wouldn’t be able to maneuver as well. The skies remained clear and sunny. The beer flowed freely, and the lines to the men’s restroom grew longer. The language grew saltier.

    Sometime in the third quarter one of Da Bears sitting behind us discovered an older fan seated several rows down from us. The man had a rainbow colored scarf and Da Bear said, “Hey, there’s a f—ing fag down there. Look at that rainbow scarf. Yeah, he’s queer and he’s proud, too.” All his buddies began discussing the fag in the scarf and then progressed to speculation about the number of fags on the Panthers team. Steve Smith was the most likely, they decided. I found it interesting the suspected football fag would likely be the Most Valuable Player for our win. Teresa and I looked at the man in the scarf and whispered he was most assuredly not gay; he had simply made an unfortunate coincidental choice in color for his scarf at the game. We should know.

    Da Bears behind us got drunker and rowdier and much louder as we entered the fourth quarter. At one point when they were out at the concession stands we talked about how offensive their language would be in other settings, but somehow we  rolled along and didn’t get angry. Maybe we were overwhelmed by the panoramic spectacle of Soldier Field. Maybe we forgave them because we were gracious winners. Maybe we were too cold to care.

    Toward the end of the fourth quarter the most vocal and possibly most inebriated Bear leaned down between me and Teresa and said to me, “You’re hot…I’d like to meet you in a hotel after the game for some fun. How about that?” I said thanks, but that wouldn’t be likely to happen.  He took it very well. Then, a few minutes later he leaned down between us again and said to Teresa, “You’re hot, too. How about a little kiss?” Teresa said ok and pointed to her cheek, but he was distracted by another guy and she was spared his affection.

    A little while later he leaned over again and said, “Hey, are you girls sisters?” Undoubtedly, there was a family resemblance due to the blue blobs on the black coats. “No, not sisters,” Teresa said. Silence as his inebriated thought process absorbed this. “Are you good friends?” He continued to try to figure out an increasingly puzzling situation. “Yes,” Teresa replied. “We are very good friends.”

    He let this sink in, stood up, and said in a thundering loud voice, “Very good friends…hey, you’re not lesbians, are you?” Teresa looked at me. Our eyes met, and we smiled at each other.“Yes,” Teresa said in the middle of Da Bears end zone in Soldier Field. “We are lesbians.” Da Bear announced this to all his friends and everyone else within earshot of his voice. “They’re lesbians – we’ve got lesbians sitting in front of us!” The shock was too much for him. It measured somewhere between disbelief and horror. He sank slowly into his seat. What happened next was astonishing. As his buddies began to get into the spirit of the “outing” and started to make loud derogatory comments, Da Bear would have none of it.

    “Hey, shut up,” he said to his friends. “That is not cool.” And with that, we never heard anything else from any of Da Bears for the rest of the game. Final score: Carolina 29 – Chicago 21. The underdogs won. Teresa told me later had she known we could quiet the end zone by telling them we were lesbians, she would have done it in the first quarter. I love that girl. She has set me free.

    To be sure, I have had many “outings” in my sixty years as a lesbian, but none more memorable or more public than the one in that end zone at Soldier Field.  An old Texas dyke with her South Carolina girlfriend on an unforgettable adventure surrounded by football history. It doesn’t get any better than this. It was bright and sunny the next day as our airplane left the runway in Chicago; Teresa and I both knew the Panthers hadn’t been the only winners that weekend.

    ***********************

    Thanks for making the trip to Soldier Field with us in January, 2006 – looking at Chicago in the winter makes me feel a little bit cooler in the heat of the summer in South Carolina. The “Outing” was a memory maker. Stay cool, stay safe and please stay tuned.