I'll Call It Like I See It

by sheila morris

Category: Humor

  • happy days, grand so

    happy days, grand so


    In rural Grimes County, Texas, in the early 1950s following the end of WWII which began recovery from the Great Depression of the 1930s, a little girl lived with her parents and maternal grandmother in a small Sears Roebuck house in an even smaller town of Richards (pop. 440) at the edge of the East Texas Piney Woods. These pictures are the fourth of her stories that depict her early childhood in that faraway time and place, the place where the little girl started learning to laugh at life.

    why is my snowman so tiny, mama? and why is he wearing a bonnet?

    Scooter the puppy, is now Scooter, the big dog

    Uncle Neville made balloons for the little country girl on her visit

    to the bright lights and big city of Houston with her grandmother

    summer visit on Posey Street in Houston with Grandma Dude, Grandma’s sister Aunt Selma, and their mother we all called Grandma Schlinke – everyone having fun? (except great- Grandma Schlinke who managed a rare smile – I don’t think she liked fun)

    what’s so funny? this little boy thinks he can ride my tricycle

    Take your hands off my tricycle

    that’s the funniest thing I ever heard

    Thanks for hanging in with us – the school experience is next for the little girl. It’s the final segment of the saga ushering in a whole new world of possibilities on her horizon. She can’t wait!

  • mid century rural Texas not modern

    mid century rural Texas not modern


    guns part of culture in rural Grimes County, Texas in early 1950s

    in her little mind she was always the Good Guy

    cowboys needed just the right hat

    new baby cousin Gaylen lived in Houston – cowboy hats came later for him

    daddy bought the little girl a swing set for her yard

    cowboy hats later replaced by baseball caps

    shirts optional in the hot Texas summers

    meanwhile, mama insisted on teaching the little girl piano lessons

    the little girl hated the piano lessons

    The guns and cowboy hats are long gone, but mama’s music lingered from one century to the next.

  • wintry mix, or snow as we call it in South Carolina

    wintry mix, or snow as we call it in South Carolina


    So you think you know snow? Ha. We are rolling in it in the sunny South. On January 22, 2022, I began this post with pictures of snow in our backyard.

    only one dog outside with me three years ago: Carl

    Carport Kitty reigned in the winter of 2022

    (she died in October of 2022 – she never had to face a cold winter again)

    Carport Kitty and Pretty have similar feelings about winter. Thankfully her heated pad keeps her toasty warm in the laundry room – Carport Kitty, not Pretty. Heh, heh.

    The sun also rises, the snowflakes melt, and Pretty will leave me to work in her antique empire while I watch the disgraceful television coverage of the 2022 Australian Open this afternoon. Bollocks.

    *********************

    Fast forward exactly three years to January 22, 2025. Old man Spike walks with me in the fresh snow around the pool in our backyard.

    Carl still with us but prefers staying inside over his cold paws in the snow

    to each his own, right?

    The Australian Open is winding down to its inevitable close this weekend. We have three Americans in semi-finals this week, and not one of them is named Venus or Serena. Hm. Ben Shelton is in the semi-finals for men’s singles, Madison Keys is also in a singles semi-final, and Taylor Townsend plays doubles with K. Siniakova for the women’s doubles semi-final. Spoiler alert: at least one American will play in a final.

    Between snow and semis, my sleep pattern is wrecked. I barely know what day it is on this continent – much less in Australia.

    Vive la difference. Stay safe and warm. Please stay tuned. We enjoy your visits!

  • the desperate place

    the desperate place


    This is the language that speaks to you in the desperate place. A place from which you lack the means or power to escape. A place in which you realize that someone you love does not, and will not ever, love you back. A place in which you acknowledge your steep falling off in health, or strength, or status. A place in which you must accept that you are losing ground, losing face. (Gail Godwin)

    Godwin writes in her book Getting to Know Death she has experienced “the desperate place” four times in her 70+ years. Hmm. She must not have called the ABC customer service line recently. Heck, I was in the desperate place more than four times this afternoon when I called to try to lower my monthly bill.

    I spoke to a computerized voice that chastised me for not using their website. I want to speak to a person, I insisted, but I don’t think you’re the one. I want a REAL person, I said several times and then agreed to let them call me at their convenience since the wait time was thirty minutes. Desperate place #1. I lacked the power to escape.

    Twenty-five minutes later another computerized voice called to say someone would talk to me in a few minutes when they were available. Desperate place #2. Wasn’t that why I was getting called back? Because there was a live person about to talk to me. I had to face the fact I was losing ground here.

    Several minutes passed before a cheerful woman, clearly real, asked me again why I was calling and how could she help. After reviewing my credentials which had previously been recorded by the computerized voice, she asked me what I liked to watch on TV. I gave her a quick rundown of Pretty’s and my favorites. I made sure to mention the Tennis Channel and ESPN since the Australian Open is on. She suggested I bundle my phone with my internet and TV. Desperate place #3. I was quickly in a steep decline of status with this woman, confident she would never love me. She recommended I speak with the Loyalty Program for discounts.

    Oh, the Loyalty Program discount person isn’t in this department – I’ll have to transfer you to them, the woman who would never love me said. Lengthy wait on hold again before being connected to another woman who was not only cheerful but also had a soothing voice. She wanted to know what she could do for me today. Desperate place #4. Seriously? You don’t know why I’m calling? I was losing face big time.

    The Loyalty Program discount person managed to shave $25 from my monthly bill but recommended bundling my cell phone with my internet and TV. Sound familiar? Desperate place #5. I apparently lacked the means or power to escape unless I acquiesced to look into the joys of bundling which I said I would do.

    Although I have poked fun today at Godwin’s desperate place, I understand what she intended and imagine everyone has been to those places when our losses overwhelm us, when we lack the means or power to escape the pain, when the person we love will never love us back, when our health and strength decline, and when we feel the ground slipping away.

    My wish for everyone in 2025 is the desperate places are far and few between, as my cousin Martin used to say.

    Thank you for hanging with us for another year.

  • field trip!

    field trip!


    Once upon a time there were two little girls who lived in two different places with one common bond: their grandmothers. What to do with seven-year-old Collins who was visiting her grandmothers at Lake Murray and five-year-old Ella on a freezing cold day outside? Why, perfect day for an indoor field trip to the South Carolina State Museum!

    granddaughters learn how rocks are made at State Museum field trip

    (Saturday, January 11, 2025)

    Naynay hovers over Collins and Ella at petting zoo in spring of 2023

    Two years earlier the grandmothers had taken the girls to an exotic animals petting zoo at Eudora Wildlife Safari Park in Salley, South Carolina. They both loved the tractor with the huge tires.

    granddaughters share ocean secrets late summer of 2023

    Later that year the girls teamed up for a magical beach trip with their grandmothers at Folly Beach where they explored the waves crashing around their short little legs.

    what a difference two years make! those little legs much taller!

    tour guide Kaka brought State Museum to life for the granddaughters

    grandmothers Kitty, Kaka and Naynay with Collins and Ella

    at planetarium aurora show

    the museum had a tractor tire, too, and we loved to play in it

    the museum had four floors – where are the grandmothers?

    so Ella, if we stand right here on this black thing,

    the man in the submarine moves

    Nana had to work in her antique empire the day of the Museum Field Trip, but Ella will be sure to tell her about her play date with Collins when she sees her this week. We all missed Nana who loves a good Field Trip.

    Until we meet again…

    **********************

    The wild fires in California have been catastrophic for so many Americans – we feel their pain as they return to a home that no longer exists, a life as they knew it is gone. We ask for clarity of thought and calmness of purpose for those experiencing losses as they make life changing decisions.