…and this is my wife Pretty…

Today is April 24th., and it is the 1st. year anniversary of our legal marriage. This anniversary seems like a Michael Reames icing on a cake or a Dick Hubbard pineapple fried pie which he has now managed to make exactly like my memories of the ones my grandmother made when I was a child being rewarded for what she believed to be good behavior.

Somewhere in that youthful childhood I must have done something good because Pretty has been the main course for me for the past sixteen years  – a main course that’s been full of fun, love and extra spice. Laughter has been the secret ingredient that’s sprinkled liberally over every dish we serve in our home, and it’s my personal recipe for whatever ails all of us.

True confessions are good for the soul, though, so I have to admit that once in a rare while I have to remind Pretty I was just trying to be funny to which she has occasionally said during the past sixteen years, “there’s no demand for being funny.” I’m sure she’s just kidding.

The past year of legal married life has been almost indistinguishable to me from the first fifteen years with a couple of exceptions. “Married – filing jointly” for our 2016 income tax returns, for example, was a noticeable difference that was relatively easy and uneventful for us but produced additional work for our tax preparer. I had several emotions going on during the preparation process, but I know for sure pride was one of them. We were no longer “single” taxpayers filing two separate returns. Our family was legal, legit; and we had the tax returns to prove it.

There is a word that Pretty and I have struggled with during the past year, however. Both of us struggle, and we know it because we’ve talked about it. The word is “wife.”

For some reason that word does not roll easily off my tongue, and I don’t know for sure what the problem is. This is my wife Pretty. How hard can that be? This is my wife Slo. Again, not easy. We’ve said this is my “partner” for so long that it’s become a habitual word for us. “Wife” is not our norm.

But this past week Pretty and I were at our new house reviewing the situation when we discovered two pieces of mail in our mailbox that belonged to our neighbor who happened to be outside in his back yard. Like a good neighbor, Pretty walked over to give him the mail.

“I’m Bob,” he said when she handed the mail to him. “And that’s my wife Cynthia inside the house.”

“I’m Teresa,” Pretty said. “And that’s my wife Sheila over there in the car.”

Score one for Pretty, and welcome to the neighborhood. The legally married lesbians are moving in – which isn’t nearly as good for property values as having the gays move in – but it’ll have to do for now.

Happy Anniversary, Pretty. You’re simply the best.





About Sheila Morris

Sheila Morris is a personal historian, essayist with humorist tendencies, lesbian activist, truth seeker and speaker in the tradition of other female Texas storytellers including her paternal grandmother. In December, 2017, the University of South Carolina Press published her collection of first-person accounts of a few of the people primarily responsible for the development of LGBTQ organizations in South Carolina. Southern Perspectives on the Queer Movement: Committed to Home will resonate with everyone interested in LGBTQ history in the South during the tumultuous times from the AIDS pandemic to marriage equality. She has published five nonfiction books including two memoirs, an essay compilation and two collections of her favorite blogs from I'll Call It Like I See It. Her first book, Deep in the Heart: A Memoir of Love and Longing received a Golden Crown Literary Society Award in 2008. Her writings have been included in various anthologies - most recently the 2017 Saints and Sinners Literary Magazine. Her latest book, Four Ticket Ride, was released in January, 2019. She is a displaced Texan living in South Carolina with her wife Teresa Williams and their dogs Spike, Charly and Carl. She is also Naynay to her two granddaughters Ella and Molly James who light up her life for real. Born in rural Grimes County, Texas in 1946 her Texas roots still run wide and deep.
This entry was posted in Lesbian Literary, Personal, Reflections, sports, The Way Life Is. Bookmark the permalink.

24 Responses to …and this is my wife Pretty…

  1. Nan R. Smith says:

    What a fabulous story! Thanks for sharing your heart! Happy Anniversary!!!!

    Big hugs to two of my favorite WIVES!


    Sent from my iPad


    Liked by 1 person

  2. Bob Slatten says:

    It’s funny, because I went through the same with Carlos, changing from partner to husband. But the first time you say it the easier it gets.

    When we were legally hitched back in 2014, the judge asked if we wanted him to pronounce us partner, or spouse or … ?
    I said we’d been partners for 14 years, and anyone can be a spouse, but we are husband and husband.

    But I digress …

    Happy Anniversary Wife and Wife.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Bob,
      What a perfect response you gave the judge and yes, it does get a little less awkward and a little more familiar each time.
      Thank you so much for the encouragement!!


  3. I love this post and the both of you. Happy anniversary and thank you for being such a wonderful example of what a loving couple looks like 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Wayside Artist says:

    Shedding happy tears for The Real Housewives, er… or something like, of Columbia SC!!! Ba Da Bing points for Pretty.

    Happy Anniversary my dear friends. May you have many, many more years together.


    Liked by 1 person

    • Ann,
      Thank you so very much for your unwavering love and constant support for all of us at Casa de Canterbury!
      We hope you know we feel the very same about you and wish we could help your healing in these times of grief and loss up north. Please come south when you can.
      Much love,
      P.S. Got your birthday card today, too – the Doctor is IN and looking good. Thanks!


      • Wayside Artist says:

        The Doctor prescribes the best medicine for grief and other troubles. He truly is a sensitive soul.

        I hope once all this estate stuff settles, I will be able to visit.

        Enjoy your birthday and anniversary celebrations.

        Liked by 1 person

      • The Doctor’s wisdom shows in his eyes. They are the eyes of kindness and compassion. Any time you spend with him is significant.
        Please do not wait until estate stuff settles – you must come before August when the real heat settles in!!
        We have enjoyed our anniversary and my birthday very much this year!


  5. Dianne Heiser says:

    Happy Amiversary!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Luanne @ TFK says:

    Happy anniversary to you two!!! Virtual hugs to you both! I feel like I know T!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Cindy says:

    So funny – I have the same problem- However Cheryl and I were married in Victoria BC 6 yrs. This July- and we have said the word “partner”- for so long! The Wife Word is just now becoming a word that has just become easier to say- congratulations to you both!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks so much and congratulations to you and your wife, too!
      Victoria BC is one of my most favorite cities – I used to live in Seattle in the late 1960s and visited there several times back then. It was beautiful!
      So happy to know the Wife Word gets easier!! Thanks!


  8. Cynthia Gilliam says:

    Thanks for the insights & the loving words. Well said. “Pretty” is a lucky gal & so are you!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Congratulations 💕to you both

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Happy anniversary, ladies. I could not be happier for you!

    Liked by 1 person

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