Blog = Press = Get Her Outta Here!

Posted on February 20, 2017 by Sheila Morris

White House Press Secretary Spicey Spicer is expected to announce the deportation of lesbian blogger Sheila Morris, according to an unconfirmed fake news leak from the White House tweeted at 4:45 a.m. this President’s Day while most everybody else was still asleep.

According to the Kiwi Leek, the blogger (a regular contributor of alternative facts) had been under suspicion since her fake reporting on Kellyanne Conway’s new Chief of Staff last week.

Investigations into her social media accounts revealed she was seen singing and dancing to the music of Swedish group Abba last Wednesday night at a covert birthday bash in an Italian restaurant. That was the first hint of trouble – no one dances to Swedish music at an Italian restaurant.

Further scrutiny indicated recent DNA ancestry showed the blogger has a 5% Scandinavian element, and everybody knows Sweden is a Scandinavian country.

Apparently her outrage toward her Swedish heritage led her to be the Brains behind the Terror Attack on Sweden this past Friday night. Everybody knows that attack was planned in the USA.

Although Sweden has not formally requested her deportation to that country for formal Crimes Against Humanity prosecution, Homeland Security is all over this threat to the American people before she ramps up more DNA attacks.

What’s next? Ireland?

The blogger was last seen being dragged out the front door of Casa de Canterbury as Pretty cried, “It’s a joke – she’s just trying to be funny!”

About Sheila Morris

Sheila Morris is a personal historian, essayist with humorist tendencies, lesbian activist, truth seeker and speaker in the tradition of other female Texas storytellers including her paternal grandmother. In December, 2017, the University of South Carolina Press published her collection of first-person accounts of a few of the people primarily responsible for the development of LGBTQ organizations in South Carolina. Southern Perspectives on the Queer Movement: Committed to Home will resonate with everyone interested in LGBTQ history in the South during the tumultuous times from the AIDS pandemic to marriage equality. She has published five nonfiction books including two memoirs, an essay compilation and two collections of her favorite blogs from I'll Call It Like I See It. Her first book, Deep in the Heart: A Memoir of Love and Longing received a Golden Crown Literary Society Award in 2008. Her writings have been included in various anthologies - most recently the 2017 Saints and Sinners Literary Magazine. Her latest book, Four Ticket Ride, was released in January, 2019. She is a displaced Texan living in South Carolina with her wife Teresa Williams and their dogs Spike, Charly and Carl. She is also Naynay to her two granddaughters Ella and Molly James who light up her life for real. Born in rural Grimes County, Texas in 1946 her Texas roots still run wide and deep.
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11 Responses to Blog = Press = Get Her Outta Here!

  1. Animalcouriers says:
    February 20, 2017 at 9:57 am

    Ha ha ha! That explains everything 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  2. Luanne says:
    February 20, 2017 at 10:33 am

    LOL. Now I get it!!! I shoulda known.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  3. Wayside Artist says:
    February 20, 2017 at 11:52 am

    No jokes! Uncle Rumpus has zero tolerance for humor. Laughter is Un-American. Fake American. Not funny! Sad.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply
  4. Bob Slatten says:
    February 20, 2017 at 7:11 pm

    I think Sweden might be nice this time of year … except for all that terrorism.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  5. skye613 says:
    February 20, 2017 at 8:22 pm

    I knew it. You can not trust those see humor at every turn. Bad Sheila. What would Red Man say…..

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    • Sheila Morris says:
      February 20, 2017 at 10:56 pm

      Funny you should bring up Red Man, De…he’s been gone a year Wednesday. I still miss him every day…I know for sure he would have had a field day with the characters we have to put up with this year…:)

      Like

      Reply

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