With apologies to composer Jimmy Van Heusen, lyricist Sammy Cohn, arranger Nelson Riddle, singers Frank Sinatra and Dinah Shore plus many others – and without anyone’s permission, sing along to their song Love and Marriage introduced in 1955 with my new lyrics. If you need a reminder of how the tune goes, ask Alexa or Siri or one of those wise women to play Love and Marriage by Frank Sinatra for you. They will happily oblige.

Burn Them Calories

Burn them calories, burn them calories,

Every time we walk we burn them calories.

Life was made for goood food, but food can be a bugger-roohoooo.

Burn them calories, burn them calories,

Every time we walk we burn them calories.

Walk a little faster and pounds will fall like alabaster.

Try, try, try to keep from walking, it’s a delusion.

Try, try, try and you will only come to this conclusion.

Burn them calories, burn them calories,

Every time we walk we burn them calories.

Life was made for goood food, but food can be a bugger-roohoooo.

**********

Now you see why I’m not a song writer.

Stay safe, stay sane, get vaccinated, and please stay tuned.

Published by Sheila Morris

Sheila Morris is a personal historian, essayist with humorist tendencies, lesbian activist, truth seeker and speaker in the tradition of other female Texas storytellers including her paternal grandmother. In December, 2017, the University of South Carolina Press published her collection of first-person accounts of a few of the people primarily responsible for the development of LGBTQ+ organizations in South Carolina. Southern Perspectives on the Queer Movement: Committed to Home will resonate with everyone interested in LGBTQ+ history in the South during the tumultuous times from the AIDS pandemic to marriage equality. She has published five nonfiction books including two memoirs, an essay compilation and two collections of her favorite blogs from I'll Call It Like I See It. Her first book, Deep in the Heart: A Memoir of Love and Longing received a Golden Crown Literary Society Award. Her writings have been included in various anthologies including Out Loud: the best of Rainbow Radio, Saints and Sinners New Fiction from the 2017 Festival, Mothers and Other Creatures; Cowboys, Cops, Killers, and Ghosts (Texas Folklore Society LXIX). She is a displaced Texan living in South Carolina with her wife Teresa Williams and their dogs Spike, Charly and Carl. She is also Naynay to her two granddaughters Ella and Molly James who light up her life for real. Born in rural Grimes County, Texas in 1946 her Texas roots still run wide and deep.

7 replies on “burn them calories”

  1. It’s getting hot enough for pool time. 85 here today. High 70’s tomorrow.
    I’m lucky Ludo and my neighbor have a thing on. Most days we walk both dogs together. It saves me 2 walks. We just take 1 long one. But the tuckered out feeling is the same!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I didn’t have to ask Alexa. I could hear Frank puzzling through the new lyrics!! 😂
    You’re cybernetic knees must be a marvel to hear you touting perambulation as a cure to pandemic pounds!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I knew you would recognize it, Ann! I walk Spike first and then Charly – we are all tuckered out by the time we get back, but the knees are a medical marvel. Can’t wait for pool time now!

      Like

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